Once Upon A December
by Lighter
Summary: It's winter break and Rocky and Colt are coming home from college to visit their parents for the holidays and Colt discovers something about himself that may change his life forever.
1. Day 1

Day One.  
  
I'm dreaming. I know I am because, I can see this white film over everything I'm looking at. I'm walking in a mall and everyone in there is looking past me as though they don't wanna see me. There's a woman beside me but I can't see her face just her hand and she's holding mine. "Stop squirming honey, you're getting new shoes for the Christmas party at school okay?" She said to me and I just looked down at her.  
  
She remained to have no face as I stared at this head with no features, but hair and ears and familiar skin tone. 'Who is this woman?' I wonder mindlessly and look around feeling her grab my foot I pulled it away. "Stop it Jefferson," she said to me smacking my leg and she tried again to grab at my leg and shove a shoe on that was waaay to small. "Stop it, I can't fit that lady." I heard myself saying to her but she didn't seem to hear me.   
  
"Johnathan get off of there." She called to another boy who was standing on top of one of the benches. He was a younger boy who looked about 8 years old. He had dirty blond hair and tanish skin he reminded me of myself when I about his age I used to jump on everything and anything just to get a rise out of Dad- I'll bet a lot like this kid is to get a rise from his mom. Haha.  
  
"Come on honey," I heard a voice beside me and I turned and looked to her. "wanna get some ice cream?" She asked me and I nodded taking her hand. The two of us walked into the halls of the mall and were gone. "Colt?" I heard someone saying. "Hey Colt wake up." The voice said again but this time I recognized it.   
"Rocky?" I asked before my eyes opened and I heard him saying. "Who else would it be? Now come on get up we're leaving."  
  
"Where are we going?" I asked sitting up holding my head tiredly and then I looked at the calender noticing the day that was circled. "Right, we're going home for Christmas." I said sliding out from the covers of my dorm room bed. "Is all the hot water gone?" I asked walking into the bathroom and Rocky just tossed me a yeah right look. He kept his water luke cold where as I turn it to as hot as my skin can stand it.  
  
Adjusting the knobs I walked over to the basket and began to strip my clothes off thinking about my dream last night. Why would I dream about something like that? Usually my dreams made sense- because usually my dreams were about girls but this one was about me being some lady's kid.   
I sat there a moment longer then shook it off, it's no big deal it's just a dream anyways. Climbing in the shower I let the water run over my face as I masajed the water into my skin it felt as though someone were watching me only I know for sure that I'm alone....  
  
.......................  
  
After my shower I got dressed quickly to get out of the bathroom and I heard two voices on the other side of the door. One of course was Rocky's but the other took a while to recognize. "All right Samuel, besides I have no where else to go this winter just as long as your brother doesn't mind." I heard the female voice saying, opening the door I confirmed my thoughts seeing Neilissa there with him.  
  
"Speak of this devil, heh heh." I said walking out going over to my bed grabbing my suit case to fill it up.   
"Don't bother I already packed for you." Rocky said heading out the door.   
"Oh," I replied. "Thanks. So what were you two out here talking about?" I had to ask and Neilissa took her glasses off and smiled at me. "Well Jeffrey, Rocky thought it might be a good idea if I went with the two of you and spent Christmas at your house- if that's okay with you?" She asked.  
  
"It's better than okay, sure." I answered. "A-are you packed I'll carry your bags."   
"I am but I can manage." I smiled an okay and went out the door with Rocky. This was gonna be a great trip now and who knows maybe 'Lissa and me can spend some time to get to know our not officially in school selves better- hey I might be a student but if she weren't so smart she would be too so rights to date her are open out of schooling hours.  
  
"Come on you guys!" Rocky called honking the horn.   
"And he's supposed to be patient," I was saying as we made our way through the parking lot. "you should hear how many times he rushed us along as kids." She laughed to herself and placed her bags in the trunk neatly so they wouldn't take up an once of space where as I just tossed mine inside and climbed into the back seat.  
  
.................................  
  
"Oohhhhh," I sang at the top of my lungs. "jingle bells, batman smells, robin laid an eeegg."   
"Colt," Rocky started to say, but I went on. "The bat mobil lost a wheel and the joker got away! He-hey!"   
  
"Colt! Be quiet!" Rocky shouted at me I narrowed my eyes at him with a mischievous smile and replied. "Okay, Rocky."   
  
"Thank you." He said mildly now and continued driving in silence. 'Lissa had a knowing thin smile on her lips as if she knew what I were going to do next and with out further adue I began to hum. "Hmm hmm hmmm.....Hmm hmm hmmm." And my hum soon turned into a light low song. "Hot crossed buns," I saw Neilissa snap a hand over her mouth to keep from laughing. "hot crossed buns," Rocky glanced at me from the side of his eyes now and I stopped and shrugged.  
  
'Lissa's looked away to keep from laughing at my antics and I pressed on waiting to hear Rocky shout at me again, there was nothing like bugging the driver believe me I used to do it to dad a lot- in fact so did Rocky and Tum tum. "They're so delicious, they're so delicious."   
  
This time he turned his head to look at me and there was a scowl on his lips this time and again I shrugged. "Colt stop it, we're almost home and the roads are getting kind of foggy so unless you wanna find yourself in an accident I suggest you shut the-...." Bang! We heard what sounded a lot like the tire popping and low and behold we were slowing down. "Shoot." Rocky said turning the car towards a gas station that luckily was close to us.  
  
"Is it the tire?" 'Lissa asked and Rocky nodded leaning halfway out of his window to see if it were on his side. "Can you change it?" She then asked and my brother nodded. "I just need a few minutes."   
"Great, I'm gonna get us some snacks, in the station, you wanna come 'Lissa?" I asked her and she looked at Rocky for a second as though she didn't wanna leave him companionless but she then nodded and climbed out of the car with me not to far behind her.  
  
I heard Rocky's door close as well and he walked around to the back of his car opening the trunk, face set on 'do it quickly.' Sometimes I think Rocky works way too hard he has too much pent up stress that he needs to learn to release sometimes, that'll happen to calm people at least once in their lives, but me I take everything in stride all and natural.   
  
"How y'all doin'?" A woman with a southern accent asked us when we walked through the push/pull opening door. "Great." I replied and walked to the back watching the lady eye ball me under her curly brown bangs that were too far in her face for the style she pulled her hair up in.   
"What are you getting?" I asked 'Lissa and she looked over the selection of snacks and furrowed her eye brows. "Don't they have anything healthier than this?" She muttered to herself.  
  
Women. Always going for what's healthy. I smiled at her and walked around getting a few things for myself like, 'devil dogs', 'circus peanuts', 'cheetos', and a few sodas. The bare essentials ya know. Neilissa picked up a few individually wrapped muffins and walked to freezer area grabbing two Brisc iced tea's one I was assuming was for Rocky, and I joined her reaching for a candy bar at the counter that she put back and gave a stern look in the process.  
  
Oh man. She even tells you when not to have too many snacks. "Thank you." The woman behind the counter said handing 'Lissa her change. "Thank you." She replied and took my wrist walking us out of the gas station. "Hey Rock' you ready!" I called to him before we reached the car. "Yeah," Rocky announced then added. "could you go back inside and get me a carton of milk though?"   
"Sure." I replied handing 'Lissa everything I'd been carrying anf after adjusting it in her hands she walked to the car.  
  
"Forgot something." I said to the owner and dashed to the back of the store; after grabbing a carton of milk my eyes came across a bulletin board of missing people. I always hated looking at those things, they're so depressing because you start wondering if those people were ever found or are ever going to be found and I just couldn't take it, but as I started to walk away on particular one caught my eye. "Whaat?" I said to myself almost mutely.  
  
The little boy on this poster looked like- and this may sound weird to you but the boy in the poster looked like me! But it couldn't be, of course not. "Jefferson McRea." I read to myself, Jefferson....? My dream! "Stop it Jefferson!" 'That woman in my dream was calling me Jefferson, but why?' I didn't know what I was doing but my hand went up and snatched the flyer off the wall, folding it up I snuck in into my pocket and paid for the milk then walked out of the store.  
  
When I returned to the car it was already started up and ready to go. I climbed in silently and handed Rocky his drink. "Thanks....." he paused and studied my face minute. "What is it, what's wrong?" He asked and I just sort of shook myself not sure of it were a nod and shake or anything I was just dumb for a minute.   
"Jeffery?" 'Lissa's voice said to me and I blinked. "Yeah?" I answered feeling her hand come to my forehead and she sighed. "No fever, did something happen in the store?" She then asked and I suddenly smile and waved them both away. "No, no not at all, what could have happened in there?"   
  
Searching for an excuse I decided on this, "It's just the fog you know, the chill in the air it got to me a bit and I felt a little sick, but I'm better now, thanks." I said lamely but the seemed to buy it and we were on our ways back home. 


	2. Day 2

Day Two  
  
We arrived at our house the next day when it should have only taken one, but you all know how Rocky drives...heh heh. Mom, Dad, and Tum tum greeted us warmly with hugs and 'you look so much this' and 'you're so much that' it was totally embarrassing. Our parents looks haven't changed too much over our time being gone. Mom has gotten some grey now along with Dad and he finally shaved off that goofy looking mustache he was getting over the years.  
  
Tum tum was a sight to see the kid actually wasn't fat! I'm just joking of course he looked pretty much how we left him only his hair wasn't in that young mushrooms cut anymore it was a little tossled which I could only guess was the 'In' style at school now and Mom filled us in on how he had been off sweets for a while after a really bad toothache he got somewhere around the time Rocky and me left for college.  
  
They welcomed Neilissa in right away and she seemed to love the attention from them, maybe she felt they were like or maybe better than her own parents- no offense to her though- and once we all had our moment of freezing 'Hello's' outside they finally let us walk in to warm up.   
"You boys can share the room at the end of the hall and Neilissa you can use this room here," Mom pointed to Dad's old office which was now actually my room. "under the stairs." Mom continued and Dad took 'Lissa's luggage into my room for her.   
  
"Thank you Mr. Douglas, I appreciate the hand." She replied and followed him inside. "You guys won't believe the cool stuff I got for Christmas this year." Tum bragged. Even at 17 the kid was still a kid, still short, and is still a brat showing off any little thing- It's great to be home.   
"I thought only Santa was supposed to know that?" I commented.   
"Yeah, like he's real." My little brother replied.  
  
I shook my head laughing to myself and shoved my suit cases into my room without unpacking and rushed downstairs into the kitchen for the Christmas cookies I knew would be there.   
Rocky on the other hand I already heard dividing up dresser space and I rolled my eyes thinking about how I was gonna fit my usually just tossed inside clothing in some tight packed drawer. "Hi sweety, you are just in time to lick the spoon," Mom said handing a wooden mixing spoon topped with cookie badder off to me, while she rolled the dough out and started to cut the shapes.  
  
I watched her with my first come, first serve reward going into my mouth once in a while and I smiled mentally missing all of this from when I was a kid to now since sometimes Rocky and me don't get to come home as often as we'd like to.  
  
"What do you think, honey..." Mom was saying holding up cutters. "Should I make more stockings this year or Santa's?" She then looked up at me and I shrugged hearing foot steps behind me, from the sound of it they were boots and I turned my vision slightly seeing Neilissa walk in and take a seat on the stool beside me. "Well my Mother always made stars when I was growing up." She commented to Mom's questions and she just laughed to herself.  
  
"May I help?" 'Lissa asked.   
"Sure, I'd love some since my son is presently busy snacking." She stressed looking at me jokingly.   
"Hey, I am not a crook." I said doing one of my impressions and held my hands up in defense. "The cops sent a man in with a spoon of dough, I'm the real victim."   
"Mm hmm." Mom said.   
"You two are so adorible." 'Lissa commented to herself placing a cutter into the dough that looked a lot like a reign deer but the antlers were missing on one of their heads- I wonder what happened to them?  
  
"Hey!" Tum ran over to where I sat and poked me in the back with his index finger making me jump from the sudden touch. "That's my spoon, you big jerk."   
  
"Tum tum." Mom warned and gave him a glance. "What?" He replied with a shrug and snatched the spoon from my hands then began to eat off what was left. I couldn't watch, bleh.  
  
"So, how'd you three kids meet?" Mom asked 'Lissa and me.   
"I was your sons instructor for the first year but we ran across some unfortunate problems along the way and I was fired." 'Lissa answered coolly.   
"That's terrible." Mom replied dramatically. "Well, what happened did you get another teaching job?" She then asked.   
"Yes, I did. After the whole mess was straightened up I was given back my old job but I'm teaching an elective class now."  
  
Mom nodded and Dad came up behind her and planted a kiss on her cheek. "I gotta to to work hon' I'll see you at dinner." He mumbled to her and she said something back I couldn't hear, gave him another kiss, and he walked out waving to all of us. "Goodbye kids, I'll see you later." And he walked out patting Rocky on the shoulder when he walked past him. "Baking without me, I'm hurt." Rocky walked over to the counter and grabbed a cutter himself and we all spent the morning cutting and baking cookies.  
  
...........................  
  
Later on that night. I was getting ready for bed when a slip of paper fell from my jeans pocket. I bent over to pick it up and wondering what it was. The flyer! How could I forget about this thing? I looked it over trying to see in the darkness but it was really hard so I walked into the bathroom for privacy and made sure to lock the door. Sitting on the tub I began to read.  
  
"Jefferson McRea, taken at age 5," It started, "from shopping district outside of Pheonix Arizona." I studied the little boy in the picture as hard as my eyes could look him over then I started to read the rest to myself. "Distinctive features are dimples and a mole on his right cheek." My hand unconsciencely went up to my face and touched my cheek feeling an up grow that I never noticed before.  
  
Startled I got off the rim of the tub and ran over to the mirror checking my face. "Oh my God." I breathed out thinking I must be imagining things because there was no way I had always had a mole on my cheek. "That means that-...no, no what am I saying. I'm Jeffrey Douglas always have been always will be.....My parents aren't thiefs and how could they steal a child they wouldn't get away with it- wouldn't they tell me eventually if I was?"  
  
I was beginning to actually hear myself as I said these things and I couldn't help but start laugh. It was an odd laugh that came from the bottom of my feet and out of my throat. I didn't mean to laugh so hard but the sound wouldn't lower itself and it was making me uncomfortable, especially because Rocky had knocked on the door now calling through it saying, "Colt are you ok in there? What are you doing?" God Rock' if you only knew. I thought.  
  
"No, haha, Rocky I'm," a paused breath. "fine. Go back to bed." He stood by the door listening for proof then he went back to his bed and dosed off. "My parents stole me, yeah right. They're the most wholesome decent people I know...they wouldn't take a kid...." I waved the whole thought off and crumpled the flyer up dropping it into the waste basket beside the sink, then walked into the bed room and climbed into bed. "Good night bro." I said to Rocky cheerfully. "Good night Colt." He replied and went back to sleep.  
  
'It was all in my head, and now that I think about it that kid looks nothing like me. I need to lay off the sweets before I go to sleep sometimes then I wouldn't have had such a weird dream.' Snuggling into my blankets and pillows I closed my eyes and drifted off. 


	3. Day 3

Day Three  
  
I woke up the next morning feeling like dirt. I had had that dream again where I was in the shopping mall and this woman was holding my hand, only I was smaller this time....She kept looking down at me but I still couldn't see her face. I shook the memory away and rubbed my eyes tiredly yawning. Rocky was already out of bed and taking a shower so I figured I'd just look for what I planned on wearing today.  
  
Grunting slightly, I pulled myself out of bed and took a while to stand up all together. I don't wanna spend my whole day thinking about nothing so I have to distract myself somehow. "Tum Tum don't shake those, they aren't yours." I heard Mom saying from what sounded like the kitchen.  
  
"Aaaw come on Mom, if I can't shake my own presents, I should at least be able to shake other peoples." Tum whined, and I heard 'Lissa's laughter fill the room. I didn't know she got up so early, it must be an instructor thing you're body's too used to it so you keep on getting up early and actually if it weren't for my dream I would have slept clear to nine o'clock myself.  
  
The shower water stopped and I could hear the shuffle of Rock's feet so I figured I might as well shower myself, "Hhhhhh." I sighed heavily standing up then went over to the dresser to get my boxers and things. A few minutes later Rocky was walking out of the bathroom drying his hair that was still a little wet and still a little long for his usual taste, Mom will probably have a cow haha. "Hey Colt." He said casually while leaving the room. "Hey, did you leave me any hot water?" I called after him and he waved a hand over his head.  
  
This was another personal joke of mine because Rocky keeps his water on like breath warm where as I turn the thing on as hot as I can get it. So I would always ask him if he left me any hot water and still I got the same response. A hand over the head as a 'whatever.' You had to be there. "What would you like for breakfast sweety?" I heard Mom asking Rocky and I smiled to myself. I can't wait to see her face on Christmas when she sees that I got her that foot massajer she's always wanted. Well bath time.   
  
...............................  
  
"Good morning, Colt." Mom said as I walked into the kicthen with everyone else, she started making my plate but I walked over and stopped her. "I'll do it Mom you just sit down and have yourself a hot breakfast for once." I stated. "Well aren't you sweet today." She commented giving me a kiss on the cheek then went to sit down with everyone else at the table.  
  
I fixed my plate and went over to the table taking a seat beside 'Lissa who smiled a 'good morning' to me. "Did you all sleep well last night?" Mom asked and we nodded. "You won't believe the dream I had," Tum started saying as Dad walked in kissing Mom on the cheek and going to the cabinet for a plate. "I was a real race car driver and I was going like a million miles an hour I was so fast I nearly passed myself and then..." As Tum tum went on I watched as our Dad sat down and something just struck me to look at them.  
  
I strared so hard I could have made out their skin patterns. My hand absently wondered up to my face again touching my cheek noticing that neither of them have anything there. I looked over Rocky then Tum and saw they had so many similarities that I don't. Like Tum Tum he looks like Mom by far same with Rocky and Dad, but me.....who do I look like the most?  
  
It wasn't until I heard Mom saying something about my hair that I snapped out of it. "It's so long sweety, didn't you ever get around to cutting it?" She asked and I laughed slightly. I hadn't exactly told my parents that I wanted to be a rock star yet so the new ponytail might have come off as a shock to them. "No Mom, I wanna wear it this long, I've been singing at college with a band I got together with and everything is going great we get gigs all the time."  
  
"No son of mine is gonna drop out of school to become some rock star...do you know how risky that business is?" Dad was trying to make a point by waving his butter knife in my direction while smearing the butter across his toast. "Cool your jets Dad, I'm not dropping out of school for this or anything and the gigs are at school, mmmrrrph."   
  
I felt Rocky kick me under the table and I shot a look at him for it; the truth is I really had planned on leaving school to have more free time to start the band out right and it wouldn't be long before we hit big I just know it, and Rocky is the only other person who knows this information so he'd better not spoil it until I can find a better time to tell them about it.  
  
"Colt's hair wasn't always long?" Neilissa asked and Mom shook her head. "I have so many pictures if you'd like to see them?" "I'd love to." Replied 'Lissa with a smile that said 'there's nothing like embarrassing baby pictures'. "Great, let me clean this up and I'll go get them." Mom stood from her seat and grabbed her plate. "I'll help you." 'Lissa said grabbing her own and Rock's.   
  
"Aaaww Mom, don't show them that one of me on the toilet." Tum complained at the thought of a stranger seeing his personals even by a picture that young; get this right, Tum tum is like three years old and sitting on a pottie chair then Mom comes in says she can't believe he's finally using it and takes his picture- embarrassing- thank God it wasn't me though.  
  
"Now now sweety that picture was very cute," She explained on her way into the living room with Neilissa right behind her. I decided that I should definitly go and see the pictures with them I may find just what I'm looking for aside from that some really embarrassing pictures of my brothers that I can frame them with for years to come haha.  
  
"Aaaww how cuuute." Was the first thing 'Lissa said when the box was opened. I walked into the living room and took a seat near her on the couch. "Even as a kid you had long hair." She said smiling down at what looked like a nine years old me. "Well at least my goofy looking bangs are gone haha." I commented. "Aaand here's one of Rocky." Mom said handing another picture over to my ex-instructor. "Beautiful eyes," She commented.   
  
Every girl thinks Rocky has beautiful eyes some of them call the cut of them Dinosuar and others say it's a cats cut but they just look like eyes to me. Every girl loves my smile and dimples which is kind of embarrassing to know but who am I to complain and everyone loves Tum Tum cause he's a kid and he's adorible but to a kid I guess he'd be someone to concider. "Aand here are their baby pictures." 'Lissa took four pictures and we all gathered around her and looked at them.  
  
"Cool, I was even a gorgeous baby." Tum said taking the picture and staring himself down happily. "I love babies, they're so cute." 'Lissa said flipping a picture over as though she were checking for a name because she couldn't tell us apart. "Where's mine?" I asked and Mom raised an eye brow and pointed to a picture in 'Lissa's hand. "There you are sweety."  
  
"No it's not." I replied casually, "See," I pointed to the bracelet on the arm. "April 17, that's Rocky." She seemed a little shocked by this and looked through the pictures in my ex-instructors hands but came up blank. "Well look at that. You know I have no ide- Oh you know what, you're Grandfather, he has them." She tried to explain. "Grandpa?" I asked rather mildly not believing her answer which sounded more like a cover story.  
  
"You looked so much like him when you were a baby he wanted some copies, that's all." I looked my Mother's face over to see if she were lying. "Why are you staring at me like that?" She asked with a laugh. "I gave him the main copy so that he could have it done, I was too busy raising you to worry about pictures, honey he said he would return it to me and he just never got around to it, that's all." I guess that makes sense. I looked through the box of pictures and saw so many of myself in there, a whole lot but I noticed something about the dates on the back.   
  
'None of these are dated lower than 5 years of age...What could that mean?' I wondered. "Well I don't know if you kids have noticed but I haven't decorated the tree yet, wanna help me? We can go pick up some new bulbs at the store, how's that sound?" Mom asked. "All right, can I get a present for Corey too?" Tum asked. "Sure, honey, but a small toy and from your own money."   
  
"Aw man." Tum tum ran upstairs and to grab his money and Rocky grabbed his jacket from the closet under the stairs.  
  
"You coming Colt, you love shopping, we'll make a day of it." Mom asked and Dad walked in from the kitchen and gave Mom another kiss. "I have to go into the office I'll be back at lunch." Mom nodding and he walked out the door waving saying, "Bye kids."   
"Bye Da-..." But I kind of trailed off and looked at Mom. "I can't go Mom, I kinda need to take care of some things first, you know old hang outs I gotta see whose still around." She ran her hand over my cheek with a meak smile and took her coat from Rocky. "Come on Tum tum, Neilissa would you like to come with us." She asked.  
  
"Oh no, I still haven't unpacked and I have to take something to the post office." She then added. "If you don't mind my staying?"   
"Not at all, we'll see you guys in a bit- Tum Tum come on!" Mom called into the air and then my little brother came running out of his room pocketing some bills. "Ready."   
"Okay," She turned to me saying. "We'll be back in a few hours, don't get into too much trouble all right?" I had to laugh at that one. "Mom I'm older now, I don't get into trouble that's for kids, you can trust me."  
  
She smiled and made a fist at me, then they all walked out of the door. Mom and her family. I looked down a second scolding myself for thinking something like that but I couldn't help it, this picture thing doesn't add up. "What's wrong, Jeffrey?" 'Lissa asked out of nowhere; she's a little too good with reading faces I think, but all I did was turn around and plaster on a fake smile lying. "Nothing, nothing's wrong."   
  
"That's an obvious lie, and believe me I've heard them all, so spit it out." She looked me so deeply in the eyes I couldn't lie, and maybe she could help me I have to tell her the whole truth. "Okay, it's like this have you eveerrr- you know felt like you didn't belong in your family?" She laughed a little at that one and waved a hand to dismiss it. "I have, many times actually."   
  
"Than you know what I'm talking about." I sat down beside her and picked up my pictures. "You see this?" I asked and she looked at it nodding.   
  
"What about it?" She asked.  
  
"Look at the back." I pointed out and she flipped it over. "None of these are dated before 1984." She looked blank on that one. "Think 'Liss'...Why aren't any of my pictures dated before I was five years old?" Neilissa looked as though she were thinking it over but she just shrugged handing the pictures back. "I really don't know."   
  
"Maybe this will help you understand...." Reaching into my back pocket I handed her the flyer from the store. "Five year old missing at Arizona- Oh Colt, you don't honestly think this is you?" She asked.   
"Well make me feel stupid already," Saying in offense and she shook her head.   
"I'm sorry, but I just don't know where you'd get such a crazy idea..." My shoulders sagged in defeat and I just looked away wondering what I could possibly say to explain things. "'Lissa....please listen to this." I could tell I already had her attention so I went on explaining my situation. "Okay listen, when we stopped at that gas station the other day I went back in to get Rock's milk and that's when I saw this flyer with the kid, and I think this kid is me......."  
  
She just shook her head not wanting to believe me, but why? "I've been having these re-occuring dreams every night now. I've been trying not to but they keep coming back and it's getting to me, the first night was right before we left to come here and that's when I saw this the next dream was a little different but they all keep pointing to the same thing....I'm not Mom and Dad's kid."  
  
"Say you are right, what then?" She asked me and I froze metally.   
"I hadn't thought of that yet...I just keep hoping its not true."   
"Then why push the subject?" 'Lissa asked logically.   
  
"Because, don't I deserve to at least know the truth about myself?" I was beginning to shout now and I didn't want to. "Calm down please, you don't need to work up a head ache." 'Lissa said to me and I frowned in defeat shrinking back onto the couch. "I need your help." I said quietly.   
"What do you need me to do?" She asked.   
"I don't know, I guess-...I guess I need you to help me solve this thing, help me find my real parents or give me proof that these parents really are mine."  
  
She was quietly thinking it over then she turned to me looking very serious before saying. "If I help you and you find the truth, no matter which one it may be, please don't hurt your family...they love you Colt this is just between the two of us for right now okay?" I had to agree to her terms because I needed her help I needed her to give me a ride...to Arizona. 


	4. Day 4

Day Four  
  
"There's gotta be something up here, something they're not showing me." I was saying mostly to myself as 'Lissa and I dug into old boxes in the attic. Almost everything in here was summer stuff that used to be put up in the windows and things, broken ornaments and non working lights- why any one would keep them is beyond me- and a few old kids toys of ours. Damn it. "What is it that we're looking for exactly, pictures of you younger?" Neilissa asked me, while moving a box over.   
"Just-...I don't know anything." I moved another box over and shook my head grwoling in the frustrating mess forming before me. "Grrr. We gotta hurry before Mom and everyone gets home okay?"  
  
"Aaahh!!" 'Lissa screamed and I turned around looking in her direction.   
"What? What's the matter?" I asked in concern.   
"A-a spider." She squeaked. "A spider? Where?" She pointed to it and I crawled over lifting my hand to smash it when I looked down at a box underneath it in the way back.   
"What's this?" I asked myself brushing the spider aside hearing 'Lissa's boot come down on top of it seconds later- Rocky would have hated that.  
  
"What did you find?" She asked after her scare was over.   
"A crack in the floor." I answered. "Can you give me a hand?" With a nod she joined my side and helped me pull the boards free from the floor and underneath we found a box marked S.S.   
"Who's S.S.?" She then asked and I just shook my head and shrugged. This could be what I'm looking for, but who's S.S.?  
  
"You're gonna get a tooth ache eating that, I thought you cut down on sweets?" Mom's voice was the first thing I heard from outside. I ran to the small window in the attic and peeked out. "Shoot. They're back, we gotta get out of here." I panicked a little, Mom would ask a million questions if she found us up here and I'm not about to get caught.   
"Cover up the floor board." I asked her because she was still sitting by the discovery.  
  
Neilissa made a nod and started to replace the boards in the floor, I waited for her as she scrambled to her feet and ran to the door and joined me running out of it. We stomped down the attic stairs and out the door, just as we hit the staircase to reach the living room the door opened and Mom and everyone walked in talking about something I couldn't make out in my state of mind.  
  
"Oh hey honey- 'Lissa." Mom said when she turned away from her conversation with my younger brother. "Hi Mom." I rushed out, and reached for one of the bags in her arms. "I'll take that for you."   
  
"You're being really helpful lately, thank you." Mom handed me the bags and smoothed my hair down.   
"I can't help but wonder what you did that you're trying to cover up for." She said playfully enough, but I wasn't in the right mind to play back I felt guilty for what I did already and hearing that didn't help it. I just don't understand why I should feel badly though, she's the one that took me- at least I think so......I don't know right now but I have to get that box.  
  
I glanced at Neilissa and gestured for her to go back to the attic and grab the box then bring it into her room while I distract Mom and everyone- if I could. 'Lissa got my hint and rushed upstairs to the attic while the four of us walked into the kitchen with a bag full of grocceries and another set of bags with gifts and more wrapping paper and also a few other items I couldn't read off of.  
  
"So what did you two do while we were gone?" Rocky asked as though we were two Deer caught in a headlight making out- if only it were that simple. "Nothing. I was in my room and she was unpacking."   
"The whole time?" He asked with suspicion and I shrugged him off, saying mildly. "Of course."  
  
My brother just shook his head. I say let him believe what he wants just as long as he doesn't catch on to me I'm good- besides kissing a beautiful girl doesn't seem like the kind of thing you'd wanna deny.   
  
As we put everything away I heard 'Lissa's door close and I smiled to myself. She's a good listener I just hope she's a good helper when it comes to our get away tonight. Tonight.......  
  
~*~ ~*~ ~*~  
  
Why does it seem like everytime you're gonna do something wrong or get in trouble time seems to speed itself up as though it can't wait to laugh at you're outcome. Weird to think but it's true. We were all sitting around the table having dinner right now and my food was going down in bites that were hardly chewed properly and I nearly gagged twice trying to swallow, but part of my problem was the huge lump in my throat on how to get out of the house without a million questions.  
  
Neilissa and I talked about it before dinner in her room.  
  
.....................  
  
"I don't understand what any of this stuff is." I said as we looked through the box marked S.S. it was all so weird to me, why would Mom and Dad be keeping some box full of stuff on my aunt Sabrina? It didn't make sense.   
"Maybe you're Grandfather didn't want to hold on to them because of a move or something? I haven't the slightest idea why someone would keep this stuff." 'Lissa said to me.  
  
I frowned down at the box that I thought would be my window and unlock this whole mystery an it turned out to be some old junk about my aunt. Great.....Well, we gotta go for dinner, I'll put this stuff back in the attic, okay?"   
"Mmhmm." She answered and walked into the bathroom to wash up.   
  
"Aunt Sabrina?" I thought to myself. Why would Mom keep things about her sister in the attic and so hidden away? It doesn't make sense. "'Lissa!?"   
"Yes?" She called through the door.   
"I need to ask you a favor, can you come here please?" She walked out of the bathroom drying her hands on the hand towel and raised her eye brows. "We're leaving tonight for Arizona,"   
"What?!" She looked at me as though I were out of my mind.   
"the sooner we get there the better.....I need you to cover for me, you know back me on my story that I tell Mom and Dad so they don't get suspicious."  
  
Neilissa seemed as though she were thinking it over heavily then she replied. "Alright."   
"Thank you..." I replied and added. "You're really-...This means a lot to me 'Lissa thank you."   
"You're welcomed to it, you deserve to know the truth if it's out there, right. So lets get out there and put on a show." She walked pas me and after slipping the box under her bed I walked out after her.  
  
Now we're sitting here in an uncomfortable conversation about the past year at school and college, and what we've been doing while I'm trying not to throw up what I'm putting down. "Mom, can I talk to you?" I asked and she looked at me.   
"Sure, what about?" I swallowed hard and felt my heart racing in my chest pounding louder and louder until it was all I could hear. "Colt?" Mom looked worried and the room started to spin a little. "Are you all right son?"   
  
"I-....." Suddenly 'Lissa broke me off saying. "I wanted to ask you if I could borrow Jeffrey for a little bit," I looked at her in shock and she went on. "I'm going to go see my family for a day or two and I kind of need someone to go with me to be my second eyes on the road, I'm terrible with maps." Mom just raised her eye brows and looked at me and I nodded wildly. Rocky was giving me a shifty eye but, Mom seemed taken by it.  
  
"All right, sure just be back in time for Christmas." She answered.   
"Wouldn't miss it, and they don't live that far away." 'Lissa replied. "Thank you."   
"When are you gonna be leaving?" Dad asked and Neilissa shrugged making the whole thing seem spontanious.   
"Well, if I go tonight I should be back by thursday."  
  
Mom and Dad seemed believed to it enough and they agreed to let us go. "Iiii'd better get packed up it might be a short trip but, you always need clean clothing." I leaped up from the table and ran into the living room.   
"He's acting weird." I heard Tum Tum saying.   
"Sweety don't talk about your brother and eat your peas."   
"Gross." He whined in defense, I walked out of ear shot of the kitchen and looked back into it mouthing to 'Lissa to finish up and come on.  
  
~*~ ~*~ ~*~  
  
"I can't believe you took so long." I complained on our ways out to the car.   
"And what was I supposed to do? Getting up any sooner would have seemed suspicious, but we're going now okay?" She was right and arguing wouldn't have done anything I needed her to be on my side not mad at me.   
"Look I'm-..." she held a hand up to me climbing in and said save it as she went fully into the car.   
"Don't say you're sorry, be more patient next time Arizona isn't going anywhere."  
  
I hate that kind of logic I heard it all my life practically. "All right, all right. Please lets just go." she held her hands up in apology and started the car. Arizona here we come. 


	5. Day 5

Day Five  
  
(Rocky) It amazes me to this day how much stuff Colt thinks he can get away with and how easily he drags other people into the things he's doing. I didn't believe that little dinner scene for a second tonight, but the question on my lips was why? What is Colt up to that he needs to be doing all of this lying? Nothing made sense, we're he and 'Lissa doing things together and wanted some alone time? I guess that would explain the not wanting to go shopping the other day and this little trip they've planned out of nowhere...but still.....  
  
I rolled over in my bed looking over at the empty one next to me and sighed heavily. "Colt, what ever you're doing....you'd better be careful." I let the words pass my lips and I closed my eyes calling it a night.  
  
~*~ ~*~ ~*~  
  
"Colt," I heard a female voice and felt a hand shaking my shoulder. "Colt wake up, we're here." I heard 'Lissa saying to me. I couldn't pull myself away from the dream, not now this woman was finally going to show herself to me and-...."Colt?" I groaned at the last call and opened my eyes. "Hmm?" I asked and looked at her blank face. "I don't know where we're going." She said to me pulling off to the side of the road.  
  
"Well where are we so far?" I asked rubbing the sleep out of my eyes. "We just hit Arizona, but I don't know where we're going from here." I looked at the map that I marked on and sighed when I saw the sign. "We're a good distance away but not really far....Are you hungry at all?"   
"What kind of question is that?" Neilissa asked.   
"I mean if there's any part of you that's hungry we could get something to eat." I replied loosening my seat belt strap.  
  
"No. I'm not hungry thank you for the offer but we should really get on track, now which way?" I glanced down again and pointed out the way. "Make a right when you get to the first turn off," She waited for the traffic to clear a little before wheeling the car back into it. It was 'Lissa's idea to drive because she said I had enough to think about right now and it was safer if she did it- who am I to complain, I am pretty exhausted from all this worrying and thinking and praying that my suspicions aren't true.  
  
4:20 a.m. I snuggled back into my seat and looked at 'Lissa, she didn't look tired but I couldn't tell from a side view. ".....If your tired or anything I could drive." She instantly started laughing then adjusted her glasses and shook her head. "I'm sorry, that was immature of me."   
"What was?" I asked stupidly and what I said hit me too then I laughed.   
"Okay, that was a good one, but I'm serious you want me to take over, I'm not tired anymore and you haven't slept since we started sooo," I felt the car pulling over again and she opened her door.  
  
"No you don't have to get out just scoot past me and I'll scoot past you." I stated and she shrugged getting out anyway. Woman, I really wasn't hitting on her this time it just saves the trouble of truck whip lash from my side. Sliding over, the door opened and she climbed in.   
"Ready?" I asked then pulled out without a care in the world to who was on the side of us and we sped off down the road. "You get some rest we should be there by seven." With a nod 'Lissa made herself comfortable side ways against the seat.  
  
"Sleep peacefully." I said and she gave me a toothy grin that looked adorable with her eyes closed. "Good night." I said.   
"Good night." She replied.   
"Sweet dreams." I said and she just laughed. "I'm gonna turn on some peaceful music, okay?" Spinning the dail on the radio I popped a tape in with out looking and the next thing we heard was the loudest Chester Bennington- "Come ooooooooonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" and 'Lissa jumped clear out of her skin dropping her mouth looking at me as I turned the radio off and smiled saying lamely. "LP forever." She punched me in the shoulder and turned right ways in her seat crossing her arms.  
  
"Aaaw are you mad?" I asked. "I'm not talking to you." She said but I could tell she was trying not to smile. "Hahaha."  
  
..............................  
  
It turned out that I guessed wrong about what time we'd get there but I was just about an hour off. Mostly because we stopped for an Egg McMuffin at McDonalds. As we ate in the car we staked out the house while parked three down ourselves and across the street. "Could we be more obvious?" 'Lissa said sarcastically while picking the egg from her muffin. "You got a better idea in broad daylight?" I commented and returned my gaze at the house.  
  
Someone's got to come out of there, I can see kids lined up for the school bus. Neilissa glanced over her shoulder to the kids at the bus stop. "Maybe they're already waiting over there?" She remarked.   
"No, none of them look like the people from my dreams...." I said so sure of myself, but thinking about it those people were children, who knows what they look like now. "Wait, the door is opening." She turned around to look and we saw three kids come out of the house, two boys and a girl.  
  
From the distance I couldn't really make anything out but they're basic shapes, but then when they walked by that's when I felt sick to my stomach and I put my breakfast down and held my throat as though I were trying to choke down the hurl building up in it. I could tell 'Lissa felt something too because she just kind of stared at them as well; they walked by joking and pushing each other all dirty blonde haired, brown or hazel eyed, tanned skinned, me's.  
  
The girl looked a year or so younger than the boys and she had nearly shoulder length hair, the two boys had near crew cuts and looked almost like twins to me. The three of them were dressed in uniforms with tie's and pressed pants and a skirt for the girl done in dark green with a white shirt and stripped tie.   
  
"My God....There's a perfect likeness." She nearly whispered as they reached the bus stop. One of the boys grabbed the girls ponytail and she turned around slapping his arm shouting. "Knock it off John!" Jonathan Before I could feel my own movements the car started to move and we tore down the street to where ever I could take us that was away from there.   
When we reached some destination my breath suddenly caught in my wind pipe and I was freaking out, breathing harder than usual and I needed to go. "Colt ar-...?" 'Lissa couldn't even get the words out completely before I swung the door opened and started throwing up on the side of the road.  
  
Neilissa's door opened seconds after mine and she joined me at the side of the car and patted my back. "Deep breaths okay honey?" She couched me but it wasn't working, the more I tried slowing my breathing down the harder it got to stop throwing up. "Look we can- we can just forget what we saw and go back home." Neilissa was saying but I pushed her aside gently and coughed to a slow stop. "What home, 'Lissa?!" I asked her straightening up. "To them?"  
  
She just started shaking her head frantically as if she didn't really know what to say and I personally didn't blame her, because I didn't know what to say myself. "You saw the way they look....for Gods sake they look like me...How am I supposed to react to that?" I waited for her answer knowing she didn't have one and she approached me cautiously as though I had a gun and she were about to try and take it. "I don't know...I just-...just come back to your house with me, we really- we just shouldn't be here right now."  
  
I stood there quietly looking at the silent plea on her face and sighed giving in. "You're right, we should get out of here." 'Lissa nodded glad that I agreed with her and she walked me to the car but reached in for a bottle of water handing it to me. "..-To rinse your mouth." She answered my un-asked question and I took it. "Thanks."   
  
Rinsing the water around my mouth I spit it out in the grass and made sure I had my second wind back before climbing into the passenger side of the car. "You better get in back incase you don't feel so good later on, it's better you lay down anyway it'll settle your stomach quicker." I nodded climbing in back and resting myself side ways for comfort. "We're out of here." She said, and we sped off.  
  
~*~ ~*~ ~*~  
  
"Colt!" Was the first word out of Grandpa's mouth when we got to the house, it is 6:27 p.m. "Grandpa?" I thought he wasn't able to make it this year, I was actually glad to see him too, because I had some questions built up inside that right now only he could answer. "Your Mother told me you went on a little trip with your pretty little friend here did you have fun?" He asked as we walked into the living room.  
  
"Yeah, it was a blast." I lied.   
"Good!" Grandpa said slapping me on the shoulder. "And what's your name?" He asked 'Lissa.   
"Neilissa Paularus. Nice to meet you."   
"You too." Course I'm just giving you the gist of it they both suddenly started speaking Japanese so I just left the conversation, I didn't know she knew another language and I didn't need anymore surprises from anyone today or any other day, but just when I thought maybe I could ignore it and things could go back to normal Rocky gave me a weird eye.  
  
"Where were you really?" He walked over to me and whispered. He's acting strange, does he know something? Rocky has this weird thing about him almost like a third eye but I could never prove it. "Like she said, Arizona." That was the truth.   
"Why did you really go there, then?" He asked after a thought. "To see her family. What's with the third degree?" "Nothing. I just don't think your telling the whole truth that's all....you two just seem...overly chummy lately, it kind of seems suspicious."  
  
I just looked at him, then blinked away. "I don't need this." I remarked and went into our room, closing the door behind me, and collapsed on the bed. What am I gonna do? My family isn't my family....they can't be...and if they are than- who are they and why did hey take me? I have to talk to Grandpa....I just hope he can give me the answers I'm looking for. 


	6. Day 6

Authors notes: Hi Kelly I didn't know your e-mail so this note is for you, I'm basing this fic on Those books they were always my favorite so I added my own things and used the idea. I'm glad you all like it another update will be coming soon if I'm not swamped with work again. Adios!  
  
Day Six  
  
We were all sitting down watching the Moulan Rouge, Rocky was trying to explain it to Tum Tum, Grandpa seemed disinterested altogether, Mom and Dad were watching holding hands like they were the only people in the room and there I sat, pretending to play 21 with Neilissa. She dealt me a hand and tapped my foot with hers and I looked at her. 'What are you going to do?' She mouthed and I just let out a shakey breath and shrugged.  
  
'Lissa rubbed my hand and put on a weak smile. "Oh I just love this part." Mom said as one of the songs picked up, and normally I'd be right along singing with her but I just couldn't. I wasn't feeling family bonding right now it would be too weird for me especially after what I'd seen today. A brief flash ran through my mind and I shook it away. Now wasn't the time to think of that because I didn't know how I was going to react to it.  
  
"Is that John Leguizamo?" Tum asked for the eigth time tonight because apperantly no one had heard him the first times he asked it and I felt my lips moving saying 'Yes.' but nothing had come out, the next thing I knew 'Lissa tapped my shoulder and pointed to the kitchen where Grandpa had gone. I let out a breath and got up. "Now or never." I said lowly and patted her on the shoulder. "Wish me luck." She wrapped an arm around my waist and hugged my side, then I walked into the kitchen for a conversation that could change my life forever.  
  
"....Um, Grandpa...?" I said when I was far enough into the kitchen for no one to hear me. "Oh hey Colt." Grandpa replied then looked at me and furrowed his eye brows. "Is there anything wrong, you look worn out?" I just kind of sat down and looked at him with a weird expression then sighed. How am I gonna say this. I know, the pictures! "Um...Do you remember when we were all babies?" I started hoping this wouldn't sound to obvious.  
  
He seemed as though he were thinking it over then he smiled and said. "Yes I do, you were little brats." He laughed. We were little brats...Does that mean I was around when I was a baby because if it does then that means I wasn't taken after all! "Thanks Grandpa!" I nearly shouted jumping up and wrapping my arms around him. "What for?" He asked but hugged me back. "For, I don't know for remembering." I stammered like an overly excited puppy.   
  
He laughed but let go of me and leaned against the counter as though I had knocked his balance so I slid an arm around his shoulders incase he needed some support. "I'm not that old." He said with a laugh and I smiled shaking my head. "I remember everything," He went on and started to think a little harder about something. "Rocky was such a pest when he was two getting into everything he possibly could, he was almost worse then Tum Tum," He laughed.   
"What about me?" I asked and he seemed to think about that a minute. "Ha, believe it or not you were shy up until the age of seven- course I missed when you were born because I had gotten sick and couldn't come by."  
  
A loop hole...."So you mean to tell me you never saw me as a baby?" Grandpa though that over a minute then nodded. "I can't really say." He said instead. "So that's why you took my baby pictures, because you didn't see me as a kid and you thought I looked like you when you finally did see them?"   
"What?" He asked me. "What's with all the questions?" "I just wanna know a little bit about from when I was a kid that's all." Smooth Colt, real smooth.  
  
"Well, I don't know who told you but I was never given any pictures of you from when you were a baby." A mirror just cracked in my mind and I tried, God how I tried not to let it show but every one always told me my life is in my eyes and sure enough Grandpa picked up on it. "What's the matter?" He asked and I just shook my head saying, "Nothing." Turning away from the whole situation I walked out of the kitchen and through the living room, to the stairs and into my room and I cried, silently, tearlessly.  
  
It felt as though it were coming all the way from down in my toes but it wouldn't quite come out. My mind was telling me everything was right there- the truth, the whole lie, the whole story, what more could I want?.....To pretend it never happened....To go back to when we were just coming here only we wouldn't stop at that gas station and none of this would be going on- none of it.....But I can't deny that it is....Course, except for Neilissa no one else really knows that I know so things will be the same for the most part if I don't decide to bring it up, but what if things do change because if Grandpa knows he might tell Mom and Dad that I've been asking him questions about it then they'll act weird because they're be wondering if-...God! this is so stupid!  
  
"Jeffrey? Honey what's the matter?" Mom called through the door. "N-nothing Mom, I just have car lag and I'm a little tired." I lied again. I can't keep doing this to myself I have to ask someone else but who else would remember me as a kid except for-...I couldn't ask Rocky because with him every question from you has one from him right behind it. But there's no one else Tum would have been too young to know or care.....Think, think, think.  
  
"Would you like me to make you some soup then?" Mom still obviously standing at the door asked. "No! Just leave me alone okay?" It was right then that I'd wished I hadn'd said that- so much for keeping things quiet. The door opened and with it came Mom with her arms crossed over her chest. "Now what were you saying, young man." She asked sternly. I smiled weakly and gulped. "I'm sorry about that, you know how I am when I'm tired?" She just cocked her head at me and frowned.  
  
"Jeffrey you could stay up til dawn and have a wonderful day so spill it, whats got you on edge?" I hated lying to her but I'd hate telling her the truth even more, what do you do in these kinds of situations? I had no other choice. "Mom, the truth is....I'm in love with 'Lissa and I don't know how to get her attention she just doesn't seem interested." Good save. "Aaaw honey, she was your instructor after all, maybe she just thinks there wouldn't be any chemistry between you two...but," She sat down beside me and placed an arm around my shoulders and suddenly her words were blurred and I saw this weird image infront of me.  
  
I was sitting at a counter with an ice cream infront of me and some woman was there talking to me, asking me these weird questions that I could barely understand all I felt was want for that ice cream. "Oh my God." I muttered and Mom looked at me with question. "What?" She then asked and I just blinked. "It was so obvious the whole time." I was in my own world right then staring at the two people one me and one who I'm pretty sure was Mom and she just took me, right out of the mall without a care in the world.  
  
Turning to look at her I wanted to scream and push her away but I controlled myself and just let out a sigh. "I know what to do now Mom, thanks for the help." I stated and she wrapped her arms around me squeezing me in a hug that I didn't participate in then she got up and walked out closing the door behind her. Right from the mall, with out a care that my real Mother would miss me, all she cared about was her own greedy need for a son.....I hate her- hate them both!   
  
That would explain so many things, why Dad- Sam always gives me such a hard time, why Rocky clearly told me I stole his parents that summer we fought and, why Jessica babies me more than anyone else, she's just trying to prove how much she can love me so I would never miss my real family and hell I was so young I probably wiped the whole thing out of my mind until now....Those jerks. I got up to confront them- this was it but suddenly standing I felt a little sick again so I rushed to the bathroom and let my anxioty out into the toilet.  
  
.......................  
  
I snuck downstairs to 'Lissa's room and hoped she was awake. "'Lissa?" I called down to her and shook her shoulder. "Hey 'Liss' you awake?" I shook her shoulder again then she rolled over and rubbed her eyes.   
"Colt?" She said blankly and I nodded knowing it was too dark for her to have seen then I said. "Yeah, it's me, can we talk?" I asked and she opened the blanket sliding over. It was strange seeing that an old girl friend of mine used to do that exact same thing whenever I snuck over to her house at night.  
  
"Is it about the conversation you had with your Grandfather?" She asked me in a voice that sounded as though she had been awake for hours rather than a few seconds. "Yeah, he said he didn't remember me any younger than five because he wasn't around, but I find it so hard to believe no one could be that busy right?" I asked her and she nodded saying, "I suppose."   
  
Licking my lips I went on. "So then I asked about my baby pictures and he said he never got any or had any...doesn't that just sum it up for a person." I turned sideways and wrapped an arm around her then rubbed my face into her shoulder. "I don't understand, why would they take me?"   
"I don't know." There was sadness in her voice and my own but something about hers was so sincere that I just nuzzled my face to hers then kissed her.  
  
She seemed as though she were resisting it at first but then she kissed me back. This is what I need, this is exactly what'll get my mind off this whole mess and I was more than willing to go for it. Rolling over on her I pressed her closer into the matress with my weight and nibbled on her ear. "Jeffrey..." She said.   
"Yes?" I breathed out kissing her again thinking we were going to get into some kind of kinky talk but instead she said. "We can't do this."   
"What?" I was dumb founded that's for sure and I didn't wanna believe it.  
  
"But this will make me feel better." I tried explaining. "Or at least make me feel at all....I'm numb ya know, nothing's coming in because of all this. My brain can't function right." I leaned forward and kissed her again. "That doesn't mean we should do it." But she kissed me again anyway. We lay there for a minute or so trying to swallow each others faces then I brushed my hand up her thigh and she sighed into my neck.  
  
The next day I snapped up out of my sleep and looked around me, I was still in 'Lissa's room! And what's worse is I heard someone in the kitchen they couldn't possibly miss me sneaking out of here...But something was different. "'Liss'?" I called but she wasn't in here. Is she in the kitchen. I got off the bed and cracked the door peeking out of the small slit then saw her walk by. "Phew." I walked out of the room and into the kitchen. She was making herself a cup of coffee and she turned to me and smiled. "Good morning, Colt."  
  
Neilissa walked over to the table and sat down taking sips of her drink and paid me no mind as I walked over to the Mr. Coffee and poured a cup myself. "You don't drink coffee." She said as I took a seat across from her and smiled. "I feel like I need to today." She laughed silently and took another sip. "Sooo?" I said grinning sheepishly into my cup. "So? What?" She asked me in return. I shrugged feeling a blush creep up in my cheeks. "So you know, how um....how are you doing?"  
  
"You mean?" She said standing up placing her cup into the sink and turning to me. "Last night?" Her voice was seductive and low.   
"Yeah," I replied then added. "You ever notice how you feel like the only people in the world when you do that?" I nodded to the thought. "Great feeling." I said and she walked over to me placing her hands on my shoulders.   
"Nothing happened." She breathed into my ear then backed away laughing.   
"What?" This was news to me, I mean sure it's been a while but to say nothing happened is a little spirit damaging.  
  
"Colt....you fell asleep." 'Lissa kissed me on the cheek and walked out of the kitchen. "Gotta love her." I said shaking my head. 


	7. Day 7

Day Seven  
  
That morning. My family had been doing casual things before lunch, Rocky was doing a kata in a corner of the room, Tum tum was playing Sorry with Grandpa and Mom was doing some paper work while Dad was on his cel phone arguing with someone. Even 'Lissa who was usually hanging out with me lately was sitting off by herself reading some book she brought with her.  
  
It was times like this that made me feel alone now adays...I tried to think of what I would be doing if this were any normal day- if I were still me and not what I think is me, but nothing really came to mind. Mom glanced up at me and I looked back but yanked my vision back to the television so she wouldn't read anything from them. 'Channel 8. Nothing. Channel 29. Nothing.' As I flipped the channels I was beginning to think that I wouldn't find anything on any way so I might as well quit trying, but when I let the remote drop beside my hip-......  
  
"Oh a family is people, and a family is love- that's a family." It was Barney and some little girl was singing her 2 dollar voice out about families but for some reason I just sat there and listened. "They come in all different sizes and different kinds, and mines just right for me, yeah mines just right for me." What about mine? There's a good chance that I have the wrong one and a good chance that this is all in my head......Or that I'm living with a group of kidnappers. But how will I know? If this family loves me then why did they steal me away from my real family? And if my real family loved me why did they let me get taken in the first place?  
  
"Hey!?" I heard a voice breaking through my concentration. "Are you crazy or something, turn this crap off." Tum tum said and Mom gave him a sharp look that he made an apologetic face to while grinning impishly. I changed the channel to any random thing and walked out of the room to my own.   
'The flyer!' I walked over to the bed and slipped my hand between the matress and felt around for it. 'Got it.' Pulling the paper out I looked down at myself smiling up at me and cocked my head. "Maybe I am seeing things?" I said outloud to see if it made any sense when the words were spoken.  
  
I just wish I could get a good lead.....It wasn't until now that I saw the phone number and let it sink in. Their phone number is right there...."If I could just call them-...." What was I saying? What if they recognize my voice, well no I guess they couldn't really know my voice after 15 years but......Maybe 'Lissa would call for me?   
  
I walked over to the bedroom door and pulled the knob but when it opened I saw someone I didn't expect to see. "Rocky!?" I jumped back out of his range as he grabbed for me. "What's going on with you Colt? You've been acting weird since we got home, so spill it." He demanded but I didn't owe him an explanation and who is he to demand one- he's one of the others now. Rocky was born before me so he must have known something.  
  
"What's it to you?" I snapped.   
"What?" He replied dumbly then looked at my hand. "It's that piece of paper again, why do you keep looking at that when you think nobody notices?" He asked and walked further into the room. "It's none of your business so back off!" I almost shouted but kept my voice low so it wouldn't get everyone elses attention. "Let me see it, Colt." Rocky commanded. There is no way he is my real brother because my real brother would respect my privacy in the matter so it was time to bail myself out.  
  
"Get out of the way." I mumbeled brushing past him and surprisingly he let me. When I made it downstairs I signaled 'Lissa as casually as I could then grabbed my coat from the closet. "I'm going out Mo-..." The words hung in my throat and I couldn't say them. "Yeah, I'm leaving."   
"Okay honey be back by dinner." She replied not taking her attention away from what she was doing. "Actually I was gonna go out to eat, and um I'm gonna stay at an old friend of mines is that okay?" I asked not really wanting to what did it matter to her whether I was here or wasn't.   
  
"Okay sweety becareful." She said and I bit down on my tongue sharply before I said something I wasn't entirely sure I'd regret. Why would she tell me to be careful is she afraid someone might snatch me up and she'd never see me again- afraid some loon would kill me and I'd never be heard from again? I can't believe how fake they all are and here I thought they loved me. "Jeffrey?" 'Lissa said when she got over to the door and gave me an odd look then mouths, 'Where are we going?' I shook my head incase anyone were looking, grabbed her hand, then walked us out of there.  
  
"Where are we going?" She asked again. "To a hotel or something, we need to talk and they'll be in the way this is serious this time." As we got into the car I saw Rocky from the upstairs window looking down at us oddly and I just grinned at him and waved, he waved back but his solid face never changed the expression of what I could only guess was wonder, but I didn't have time to wonder if Rocky was gonna rat out my behavior or not I needed to get to a phone.  
  
* * *  
  
When we pulled into the lot of a Super 8 motel, I glanced across the street then at 'Lissa. "Tacos?" I asked her and she shook her head. "I'm not really hungry, you go on ahead and I'll get the room." She got out of the car and I turned it back on pulling away when she was out of sight. I hope she isn't getting sick of this whole ordeal, I need her more than anything right now and if I lose her than I might just as well give up.......  
  
After grabbing a bite to eat I walked into the hotel where Neilissa was waiting for me. "I got you something anyway." I said to her, explaining why I had an additional KFC bag. The two of us were eye balled by the guy behind the counter but that was the only real attention we got from anyone as we got on the elevator and went to our room.  
  
The room was bigger than I expected and she got one with two beds. While she took off her jacket and things I went over to the phone right away and grabbed the reciever holding it out to her. "I need you to call them." I said to the questioned look on her face. "You have too, I'll be right here helping."   
"Then why don't you do it?" She asked and I made an exasperated noise then shook my head. "Because I can't," Oh that was logical.  
  
"Here," I said taking the phone back and dailed the number into the base.   
"Hello?" A woman said and I handed the phone back to 'Lissa. "What do I say-.....Uh, Hello, is this Mrs. McRea?" She said getting her professional voice over the phone and I snickered off to the side then slid over to her bed and sat down beside her. 'Lissa turned the phone outwards so we could both here what she was saying. "This is she, what can I do for you?" Mrs. McRea asked.  
  
"Um, I am collecting for um....."   
"Say the C & N found....say it."   
"The C&N found..." She moved the reciever back and covered the mouth piece looking at me saying, "The what?" I shook my head and she put the phone back to her ear.   
"Is that some kind of television station or something?" Mrs. McRea asked her and Neilissa nodded then said. "Yes, we wanted to offer you the station at a lower price than what you'd normaly pay if you decide to switch over to our company." This was classic, I could hardly keep in my laughter there was no way this woman was buying this act.   
  
"You don't get the station? Well would you like to purchase it?" 'Lissa asked. "Okay thanks anyways, goodbye Ma'am." And she hung up.   
"That was great, now we know the number isn't invalid anymore." I said to her throwing my arms around her for a hug and she raised her forearm the best she could and patted mine. "I think she was a little suspicious," She was saying.   
"Of what, our initials make the perfect back up plan." I answered feeling her hands drop from my arms.  
  
"Colt, when are you going to tell your parents about all of this?" She asked me plain and simple but I just looked away from her. I wanted to tell them after the holidays but keeping it in was getting harder and harder, because if there's anything I've learned from the past is that nothing stops Rocky from getting what he wants that trait he got from Dad- his Dad. "I don't know how," I replied sitting beside her and grabbing my lunch. We sat long ways on the bed at the top beside each other and ate quietly while the tv played the Fairly Oddparents.  
  
"I'll be there for you, Jeffrey, you know that...." 'Lissa was saying sweetly and rubbed my leg a second then went back to eating a taco while I had a chicken leg- neither of us really cared for what the other person was eating, haha we were like a miss-matched set sometimes.   
"I just don't wanna ruin the holidays for them, I mean I think they're jerks for lying to me but they still deserve a decent holiday right?" She didn't answer me, mostly because she didn't know what to say back but I could tell she was thinking I should just get it over with now because tomorrow is what Tum calls Christmas Eve's eve.  
  
"Break it to them carefully and it won't be as hard as you think it is.....I hope." I looked at 'Lissa and thought about it long and hard. I want my family back....at least I think I do.....but what's gonna happen to the Douglas's? "I'll do it, just as-....just as soon as we get back home." I answered finally.  
  
"Which will be?" She asked and I was hoping never but I knew I couldn't keep running from them I didn't wanna end up hating them I just wanted to know the truth and possibly let my real Mother and Father know that I'm ok, why should they worry when nothing was wrong. I mean, I'm happy and healthy what parent wouldn't wanna know that about their kid....Yeah, nothing will change once this is out of my system everything will be fine again.   
"Lissa, lets go home, I think I'm ready now."   
"Are you sure?" She asked.   
  
"Yeah, it's time I stopped beating around the bush with them, everyone has a right to know what's going on even if it might make them mad at me for snooping I can't keep this a secret forever." Neilissa smiled at me and gave me a single kiss on the lips. "It's nice to see my students growing up and taking responsiblity for their actions." She said and slid off the bed. I grinned impishly to myself then closed my eyes. Even if the world changes tomorrow its nice to know that some people will stay the same. 


	8. Day 8

Day Eight  
  
Here we are. Standing outside of Mom and Dad's door way about to knock to go in, and to tell you the truth I'm beginning to lose my nerve on the whole idea.  
  
Neilissa and I must have been in that hotel room forever working on what to say and how to say it, because our afternoon turned into quick darkness. "Jeffrey?" She whispered so Mom and Dad wouldn't hear us through the door. "Yeah?" I asked knowing what she was going to say. "Would you rather wait until tomorrow? We can just watch a video all night if can't sleep?" Didn't expect that. "No 'Liss'....I have to do this right now." I was saying. "Or I'll never get up enough courage to do it again....besides that I need to know the truth or I'll be up watching movies for the rest of my life."  
  
My arm raised and my hand balled into a fist but I just held it in front of the door. Swallowing hard I leaned it downwards and knocked. "Come in." Mom's voice said. 'It's now or never.' I felt Lissa's hand rub my back for support then I walked inside the room and closed the door but it re-cracked itself anyway so I left it alone. Taking in a breath I walked over to the bed and sat down on the corner holding my hands in my lap and decided to focus on them instead of my parents.  
  
"Listen," I started wishing I hadn't. "It's about what I've been doing the past few days." Mom put her book down and Dad seemed a little disinterested- he must have thought it was about a girl again. "Go on, honey." Mom encouraged my hesitation. "I guess there's no dancing around this huh?" I was stalling again.   
  
"Jeffrey it's late what ever you have to say just say it son."   
"I'm not your son." I said without meaning to. "What?" Mom asked in blank surprise. "I'm-, I'm not your son." I repeated a little shackily. "What on earth would make you say something like that honey? Of course you're my son where would you get the idea that you're not?" Mom's voice was either scared or worried but right now I couldn't see straight and my voice just started blurting things out.  
  
"Why are you lying to me?" I asked her tightly, plain, and simple. "I'm not lying honey, where- where is all of this coming from are you saying you want a devorce from us but we're your parents sweetie we love you an-..."   
"Enough!" I snapped this time, I just revealed her secret life and she had the nerve to try to keep lying to me.   
"Jeffrey you watch you mouth around your Mother." Dad said pointing a finger.   
"Well when I get back to her I will....." I shook my head was I really saying all this to them?  
  
"Jeffrey you're not making any sense right now, what are you talking about?" Mom began to tear up and I wanted to give her a shoulder but I couldn't my eyes just said she wanted to cry because she'd been found out. "It was the pictures, you didn't have a single one of me before the age of five I just found it a little weird," I lied to them. "I asked Grandpa to confirm that he didn't have my baby pictures like you said....then I checked around and well one thing led to another and here were are." They were silent. I had to give them a chance to tell me the truth, and if I gave them all the fact who knows how many more lied they'd make up to explain the kidnapping.   
  
"So, care to loosen your tongues now?" I asked them, this wasn't how Lissa and I had rehearsed it at all, why was I freaking out on them?   
"Jeffrey...." Mom started. "Son, I realize I can't lie to you right now because of this but I want you to hear me out first..." I was listening. "You aren't my real son, but that doesn't mean that I don't love you all the same....It never changed a thing." She wept out and I lowered my eyes, I never wanted to make her cry not ever once but this whole thing was getting out of hand for me I had no idea I'd freak out in the confrontation like this but now there was no going back.  
  
"So, why'd you do it?" I asked lowly. "Why'd you take me from my Mom and Dad?" She wiped her face in utter surprise and looked at me. "What do you mean?" She asked but added. "I didn't take you away, you were given to me honey." Mom climbed out on bed and sat at the end beside me.   
"....What?" I asked as if the words needed a while to sink in. "Honey I'm going to tell you something that I never intended to tell anyone ever...." She paused letting out a sigh and placed a hand on my shoulder looking at me. "You aren't my son,"   
"I know," I stated.   
"You're my sisters son." She said plain as day.  
  
"Aunt Sabrina? But, I don't understand, if she's my Mom then why am I with you guys and not her?" I couldn't help but ask. "My sister was, well she was part of a Cult honey, way back in the days when she needed direction in life and couldn't find any on her own." She paused then went on. "She was easily taken because she was so fragile back then, but one day she wanted out, that was around the time she knew she were pregnant with you sweety." I blinked. "She didn't want her first and possibly only child born into a life like that."  
  
I started to shake my head, "So I'm your sisters son? My Aunt is really my Mom?" Mom nodded and I sniffled a bit. "But the pictures? Why did she take so long to give me to you guys?" I asked. "She had no mode of transportation sweetheart, she lived in Arizona the walk took a while, she had to make stops, she couldn't get a ride and she had to hide out for a while." Mom placed her hands around my shoulders and rubbed them. "Are you ok now honey? Do you need anything else explained to you?" She asked and I was so blank at the time I just shook my head. "No." I answered.  
  
"And do you still hate your Father and me?" She then asked out of nowhere and I looked at her stunned. "I don't hate you guys, I just don't like that you didn't tell me the truth." I replied and stood up. "But, now that I know, I guess it's not really a problem anymore....I mean I'm still part of this family right?" She nodded. "I'm- I'm sorry I bugged you. Thanks for telling me, we can act as if this never happened okay?" I asked looking at the two of them.  
  
"If that'll help you than sure we can forget." Mom answered.   
"Sure thing son, after you apologize to you're Mother for your behavior." I laughed slightly then turned to Mom. "I'm sorry Mom." She rubbed a hand through my hair and told me it was ok, then I walked out the room closing the door behind me. Neilissa wasn't in the hallway so I went down to her room and knocked on the door seeing the light on and her sitting on the bed. "Are you still awake?" I called through it then opened it. "Lissa?" I walked in and climbed on her bed. "So how did it go?" She asked looking at me.  
  
"I blew up on them only to get my fuse put out quickly."   
"What? So what did they say are you going home to your family?" She asked worried. "No, I think I wanna stay here with them, I mean I'm just the son to someone else in the family it's no big deal."   
"What do you mean?" She asked.  
  
"Mom said that my real Mother is my Aunt Sabrina isn't that great?" I answered.   
"Yeah," She replied.   
"My Mom, my real Mom was in a cult because she was a little out there and accidently got mixed up in one, then I guess she got pregnant from someone there and she didn't want that life for me or herself any more so she got us out of there and it took her a while to get from Arizona to L.A." Lissa nodded then smiled.   
"Thats good." I nodded as well. "Yeah it is good....I wonder if she misses me though?" I couldn't help but wonder.  
  
"Yeah, I can't help but wonder what the McRea's have to do with anything though?" It was as if the words just snapped back into my brain. "They lied to me again...." 


	9. Day 9

Authors Notes: Thanks for sticking with me the whole way you were great :). And I hope you all read my next fics coming out which will be sequals to this both this fic my story called "Girl" and a sequal I'm making for my friends fic called "Monsters Ball." And this one will be called "The Blood Lore" I took it out before because I didn't like the way it was going so I took it to another direction to try again. And for all the Rocky fans there will be a sequal to the story "Silent Voices" called "Dial Tone" Adios for now and don't stop reading.  
  
Day Nine  
  
Here we are having breakfast again. Tum tum is soaring through his food so he can run off and play video games, Rocky is reading a comic book that Dad keeps telling him to put away while he's at the table and Mom keeps giving me these loving looks as if I'll forget how much she loves me when she looks away.  
  
I smiled quaintly at her then went back to my breakfast. How can I bring up the subject of the McRea's without jumping down their throats again? 'Lissa seemed out of the picture rght now as she was just casually putting dishes away in the cabinets after unloading the dishwasher. She's so comfortable here after only a few days or so and she isn't any part of our family, was it like that with me? Did I get dragged here and just decided to fit myself in because things are so peaceful or quiet so what difference did it make where I lived as long as someone loved me?  
  
That didn't sound like something little Jefferson might have thouhgt, but why don't I have any memories after being kidnapped? Is Aunt Sabrina really my Mother or is she just a good cover up? Maybe a babysitter gone bad? She does live in Arizona now, I remember getting a letter from her on my birthday- if that's even my real birthday.  
  
When 'Lissa left the kitchen I was tempted to follow her but Mom cleared her throat and got everyone's attention. "Can I speak with you boys for a minute, please? And I want your full attention on this." Rocky and Tum stopped what they were doing and looked at Mom to show her they were listening. "It's something I honestly never planned on telling you kids, but it seems I really have no choice now and I want you to know that I'm sorry for not telling you in the first place but," She paused for a long while then looked from me to them and said. "Boys Jeffrey isn't your real brother."  
  
"What?!" Rocky said and Tum tum just twisted his nose up in confusion, I couldn't look at either of them right now for fear I'd suddenly see what they honestly thought of me after all these years of being brothers. Rocky did turn and look at me in shock as though asking 'Is she telling the truth?' I glanced back meekly and kept my head down. "If he's not our brother than who is he?" Tum tum asked and glared at me as if I had suddenly become a speculation in a lab.  
  
Mom looked at Dad for support but he seemed distracted at the moment so she went on. "Well your Aunt Sabrina was a confussed woman she had spent time in a mental home and everything before she ran off to join a cult." Mom went on explaining the story she had told me until she was done and Rock' and Tum were flabbergasted that was for sure. "So you're actually my cousin?" Tum asked and Mom nodded. "Oh, okay it's not like he's a complete stranger he's just my cousin." Youth.  
  
"No, honey." Mom corrected. "He is still your brother you just know the truth now." Dad cleared his throat point an absent finger in Tums direction. "Sweet heart you're just confusing him now."   
"You're confused yourself Mom." I mumbled. "What?" She asked looking at me. "I said you're confused too." I clenched my jaw trying to keep my words in but something needed to be done, some things still had to be answered.  
  
"What, did I leave something out?" She asked giving me the biggest opening in the world. "Yeah, you did." I answered pulling out the flyer and sliding it across the table she reached out for it and her mouth dropped. "If your story is the truth," I was saying coldly, "than who are the McRea's?" I asked. The two of them looked the flyer up and down in complete shock. Then Mom looked up at me and held it out to indicate what she was talking about. "Where did you get this?" She asked me.  
  
I had no reason to lie or protect them anymore, so I told them the whole story. About finding the flyer while at that gas station on the road and seeing the family with my own eyes, how I lied about staying at a friends house the other night, and seeing 'Lissa's when we went to Arizona all of it. Mom and Dad- I mean, Jessica and Sam just sat there in disbelief. "You're not my-....I don't understand how this could have happened."  
  
My adrenaline was running now and I was beginning to get angrier by the second. "You stole me away from my family and you didn't tell me because you didn't care!" I stood up and Jessica stood too with an angry look on her face. "First of all I never stopped loving and secondly I still think of you as my son, this little piece of paper may say other wise but it changes nothing it doesn't have to Jeffrey." "Jefferson!" "What?" She asked at my outburst.  
  
"My name is Jefferson! Not Jeffrey, not Colt neither of them exsist!" I shouted. "What's all the commotion about," Grandpa was saying walking into the kitchen. "How's an old man supposed to get any sleep in here with all the shouting." We all went silent because of Grandpa's innocent interruption, Mom and I just sat there glaring at each other in silence until Grandpa sat down and started eating. "I'm leaving." I said tightly but when I walked past Sam he grabbed me back into the kicthen. "Get off!" I shouted jerking my arm free.  
  
"Where do you get off acting this way? Huh?" He asked me and I just stood there bitting my tongue. I heard 'Liss's steps behind me and I couldn't bare to turn and face her. I was doing the one thing she asked me not to do and that was hurt my parents, but you know what these people- those brothers- they're not my family. They are liars and cowards to not tell me the truth from the start. "You apologize to your Mother, now!" I balled up my fist and Grandpa was on his feet now at Sam and Jessica's sides. "Colt, what is going on with you?" He asked.  
  
"I can't hate you Mori, but ask your daughter she'll tell you the whole story about how she kidnapped me as a baby and never told me until I had to force it out of her just now." I saw Jessica bitting her tongue then went on. "Go on, tell them, tell the world how you did it Jessica....The shopping mall in Arizona, the little boy trying on shoes you just took me!" Grandpa looked confused as hell then he looked from Mom to Dad and asked. "Is this true sweet heart?" Jessica didn't answer she just brushed past me and out of the room upstairs with Sam following.  
  
"Someone mind telling me what's going on?" Grandpa asked looking exasperated. "I can't tell you, because I don't exsist to tell you." Turning around I marched myself upstairs to my bedroom hearing foot steps behind me- close behind me at that. Just as I swung the door shut it was pushed back opened before it could slam and I turned around seeing Rocky there.   
  
"What do you want?" I asked him but he just crossed the room to where I was standing at punched me! Right in the jaw! I was tempted to swing back but I just licked my teeth to see if there were any blood on them.   
  
"Real mature Rocky, turn a man around and hit him, didn't your Grandfather teach you anything?" I spat at him smugly. "You little-..." He didn't finish the sentence but I knew the rest of it. "How can you sit there and not care after all that Mom and Dad and Grandpa have given you."   
  
"Think about all they've taken away?" I shouted back. "My real life, my name, my identity!"   
"You are Colt Jeffrey Douglas, you always have been and you always will be." Rocky said rather calmly, though through his teeth. I shook my head trying to walk past him and out of the room but he pushed me back to where I was standing. "The person you speak of Rocky, doesn't exsist, he never has and unless your parents have another kid- he never will!" I shouted in his face.   
  
"Alright if he never exsisted then who were me and Tum sharing a room with for most of our lives, who practiced ninja with us every summer?" He went on. "Who went to collage with me and shared a dorm and started a band and everything else you've accomplished in life?" I scoffed those statements away and said very lowly. "Nobody."   
  
"And as far as you know your life hasn't changed, all you have to do is pretend back to before your Mother stole me and it'll be like I was never here at all."   
"She's your Mother too." Rocky wanted shout at me.   
"No she's not!" I retorted louder. The both of us narrowed our eyes at each other but Rocky retracted his claws.  
  
Turning his eyes away from me I didn't know what I was doing right then but I really pulled back and let him have it. The way he did it seemed as though he were almost mocking me for being this way- as if he were calling me stupid. "Don't make fun of me Rocky!" I shouted lowly at him. "I don't need this kind of hassling from the worlds most perfect guy, not right now." I continued but all he did was hold a hand up to his cheek and look at me with a little annoyance.   
  
"You've always been a cry baby, you know that?" He started saying as he picked himself up off the floor and walked over to the door. "You've always acted like the world didn't matter but deep down you care- why don't you ever show that side enough, Colt?" Rocky asked me in all sincerity.   
"Why?" I mocked. "Why? Because Rocky, I don't know who I am, I don't know what I'm really like- and until I find out.....I'm not here, because I'm nothing." "Psh." He waved a hand away from me as he walked out of the room.   
  
'So what's his problem?' I couldn't help but wonder. 'It's not as if he hasn't told me he doesn't want me around a few times in life- now his wish is granted. Right?' I walked over to the dresser and grabbed a handful of my clothes getting them folded a little better so that I cold pack. I didn't know where I was going to go but I knew I couldn't stay here- not with all of their stares, and whispers and looks of confusion. It wouldn't be comfortable or right of them.  
  
Maybe though, I could go downstairs and say that I'm sorry a little for being so hard on them, I mean they have taken care of me since I was taken they could have easily dumped me off somewhere if they were sick of me and with the way I was I'm sure everyone had their fair share of that wish.....But I don't know how to begin so, I'll just hang out up here for a while.  
  
Sitting on the bed I closed my eyes and tried to relax while the time passed me by.  
  
.......................  
  
"Jeffrey?" I heard a voice saying to me. "Jeffrey wake up." It sounded like Neilissa so I opened my eyes and smiled at her. "Hi." I said and she smiled back slightly then frowned and patted my cheek. "What happened, Rocky hit you?" She asked. "What gave it away?" I said being a little sarcastic. "That he has a twin cheek?" She just ran a hand gently across it then looked at me. "Does it hurt?" She then asked. "No." I replied, lying because it actually did. "What time is it?" I then asked. "5:20 p.m." 'Lissa answered. "You've been up here for hours."  
  
We were quiet a moment as if wondering what to say about that statement but instead she said. "You're uh....Sam and Jessica wanna talk to you." I raised an eyebrow wondering what they wanted to tell me since everything was already out in the open, I mean, what more could they have to say?   
"We were all talking about this downstairs, even me." She went on. "And we'd all like for you to come down and hear what we have to say." Amazing how she can have family meetings with people who aren't even her family, how comfortable she was with us from the start.  
  
It's easy for her to be a part of someone elses family so why am I having such a fit all of a sudden. I mean they do love me, no matter how they show it someone times, maybe all the commotion was just a big mistake. "I think I have some things to say myself." I responded to her and slid off the bed to standing and she was right beside me. "Lets go."   
  
When we walked downstairs I saw everyone sitting on a couch and looking rather serious. Jessica and Sam were on the same couch together, she looked so sad and he just looked annoyed with the whole thing- I didn't blame him. Rocky wasn't holding an ice pack against his cheek like I'd imagined he just sat in an arm chair off to the side, Tum and Grandpa were sitting on the love seat as they call it and my little- well ex-little brother looked pissed at the seriousness of the room- he never liked it when things got serious like this, and Grandpa just looked confussed, sad, and scared.  
  
I decided if I was gonna forgive and forget I'd have to pull everyone out of this funk. "Why the long faces?" I asked and they looked up at the sound of my voice. "Who died?" I laughed out to show them I was joking but they remained quiet until Jessica spoke up. "Son- uh," she paused to correct herself. "Jefferson right," I nodded. "We've been talking and we've decided to let you go." What? I knew it. They never wanted to keep me even after the fact of stealing me, they just felt guilty.  
  
"We want you to know that we still love, we always will...." She added. "But we respect your anger as well as your decision to leave us, but we want you to know that we will miss you and never forget you." She then stood up and met me in the middle of the room pulling me into a hug. "We've um....we-.." Her words we forced and cut off. "We're sorry this happened and..." She couldn't speak anymore and just broke into tears.  
  
Rocky opened and closed his fist then looked at me. "We're gonna miss having you around you loud mouth jerk....." He said then went on with tears forming in his eyes. "Ha, you were the blue of the fabulous Douglas brothers." I smiled for a second at our old school going name. "It's gonna be hard doing things the same without you." What is everyone getting at? I could tell Tum tum was next because he started to figgit and I shook my head as if telling him not to say anything.  
  
"This is stupid, but since I can't tell you not to go then I guess I'll miss you too- although I don't see why I have to you traitor." Tum was furious and near tears but before I could walk over to him to tell him that I wasn't going anywhere Grandpa put his hand on my shoulder and looked at me. "Once a ninja, always a ninja...I don't care whose family you belong to." And with that he took out a ninjas belt and handed it to me. "I was gonna wait until tomorrow but now's as good a time as any for gifts I mean it is Christmas eve you know."  
  
I nodded feeling my face scrunch up weird because I was gonna cry myself, then Sam stood up and crossed the room to me and gave me a hug. It was the weirdest thing I've ever had happen from him, this was the man that usually yelled my name at the top of his lungs because I'd done something wrong, this was the man that prized everyone in the house but me because I was such an idiot sometimes but today he's hugging me and letting tears fall down his face.  
  
"I'm gonna miss you my son," He whispered. "You were always my favorite...never had to worry about Jeffrey ya know, he was a trouble maker but he had good intentions always...." He sniffled a little then went on. "Just don't lose that, stay the way you are."   
"And I plan to." I finally spoke up for myself. "Why is everyone acting so weird?" I asked knowing why but I haven't told them my good news yet that I was actually staying with them.  
  
"Listen everyone I've decided that I-..."   
"We called your parents Jefferson." Sam was saying and Jessica held the phone out to me. "They're waiting to hear your voice." Jessica added. They called my-....I took a cautious step forwards and held a hand out reaching for the reciever. When it was firmly held in my hand I gulped before pressing it up to my ear.   
"Hello?" My real Mom said on the other end. Her voice....."Is someone there?" She asked again and I blinked in disbelief. "We want you to be happy son." Jessica said to me. "Even if it's not with us." Sam added.  
  
I knelt down slowly and sat myself by the phone on my knees then sighed after taking a shakey breath. "Hi Mom," I started to say seeing a sudden flash of hurt on my Mom's face. "It's uh, it's me Jefferson....."  
  
THE END 


End file.
